Last time Momma took me to the vet in Minni, it was to have me spayed. It was a horrible experience and I hated it. That is why when we went zooming back to the clinic the other day, I was shaking like a leaf. And it turns out my fear was well-founded.
Earlier in the day, Momma decided to remove the gate on the steps that prevented me from going upstairs. She had been concerned that if I, for some reason, took a flying leap between the railings to the main level, she would have to scrape me off the floor. Now, however, she was tired of stepping over the gate and decided to throw caution to the wind.
All was going well – I didn’t even consider playing Wonder Woman – and I had a good time exploring. Nanny Becky was over and I enjoyed following her around while she worked and Momma read the paper. It turned out, however, that height wasn’t the main danger on the second floor – there was a toxic house plant sitting in plain view and at the perfect level for me to eat.
When Momma finally pulled herself away from the paper to see what I was up to, she discovered me surrounded by little green leaves from her umbrella plant and licking my lips. Amazingly, she realized that the plant I had ingested might be poisonous. This disruption in her day did not sit well with Momma because she was now pretty sure that she would not make her luncheon appointment downtown. She was also pretty sure there would be another vet bill involved. (In fact, she specifically pointed that out to me later.)
Weighing her options – my passing away vs. the vet bill, Momma finally decided to do the right thing and called the clinic (plus Becky told her to). They said to either make me throw up at home or to bring me in. She lacked the skill or the supplies or something to make me throw up and was also concerned about the mess, so off we went. Luckily, Becky rode along, as usual the voice of reason and calm.
I was immediately brought into the examining room at the clinic as time was of the essence. Also of the essence was making me puke, which I did – 6 or 7 times. As I said, my dread of the veterinary clinic was warranted. My vomit included dog food, some red string and – sure enough – green leaves! Momma barely noticed – her attention was on the bill for $87.59.
When I texted Uncle Chuck to see if I had a claim against Momma for negligence, he said that he is exploring a legal theory called the “attractive nuisance.” I wonder if he is talking about the plant.
Lina, Possible Plaintiff
One thought on “The Attractive Nuisance”
Chère Nièce Lina,
I am happy to report our legal claim against Momma is progressing nicely. I predict you will soon be fee owner of luxury South Florida condo, and Momma will be asking is she can crash in your former crate.
In the meantime please remember to whimper pitifully when in the presence of strangers, as we are making great progress on our negligent infliction of emotional distress claim.