Momma’s New Mission

We are in Minni again.  This time Momma needed to get home to prepare for a trip to Europe (as I may have mentioned, the budget only applies to me).  Nothing has changed here – this time we arrived to find 9 inches of new snow.  I really had no choice but to sit in the snow and go potty.  And once again I was stuck in my tiny airline carrier and stuffed under the seat in front of Momma – for which the airline charges $125.00 each way.

It probably goes without saying that this has become a real sticking point with Momma, especially since someone told her that human babies under a certain age fly free.

So Momma has started complaining about this policy to anyone who will listen – friends, foes, neighbors, people she doesn’t even know.  A few days before we left for Minni, Momma was at a brunch and brought up her new favorite subject.  One of her friends told her that it was not a problem – all Momma had to do was get a doctor’s excuse saying she is depressed (no problem there) and I could fly for free as a service dog!  Momma was “all ears” – a comment she often makes about me.

A couple of days later, Momma and I came hurtling into the Fort Myers airport to fly home – running late as usual, me bouncing around amid a mountain of bags, Momma half crazed.  She lassoed some guy into helping us and once again launched into her usual tirade about the price of my “ticket.”  He took one look at Momma and said that the airline would probably make an exception for her because of her emotional distress.  He told her that all she had to do was get a statement from a mental health care professional saying that she must have her dog on board with her to “calm her down.”  That was all she needed to hear – she is now hellbent on seeing a shrink and getting that statement.  (For my part, for once I am all for her little scheme – I have heard that service dogs don’t have to be confined to a carrier!)

I have little doubt that Momma will be able to get herself declared crazy.  And I’m looking forward to my new job – and the view from 40,000 feet.

Lina, P.S.A. (Psychiatric Service Animal)


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